A chapter in a book called Axiom really struck me yesterday, and I wanted to share it with you. The title of the chapter was “The Tunnel of Chaos”, and the concept was a simple one that has the chance of making a profound impact in every single person’s life.
Here we go.
Most relationships, Hybels suggests, devolve into a state that he calls “pseudo community’”, where people aren’t quite telling each other the truth and they’re not quite celebrating each other. They share 98%, but hold back the other 2%. They tolerate each other, they accommodate each other, and they settle for sitting on the unspoken matters that separate them.
This is true with families, teams at work and even places that are supposed to be different like churches and Life Groups. Though we say that we long for and believe in the value of authentic community, we settle for pseudo community.
Why? Fear. We are afraid of traveling the road between the two. It is this road that Hybels terms the “tunnel of chaos”. It is the road of conflict, difficult conversations and tears. It is the relational chaos that has the potential to erupt when we try to cover that final 2% of life that is the messiest.
But it is also the only road to authentic community. It is a community where people really do know, serve, love, challenge and celebrate one another. It is a community where it is ok to be honest…where they are actually expected to be. If you never experienced a friendship that has made it through the tunnel of chaos, you are missing an amazing, God-honoring thing.
So, my challenge to us all is a simple but difficult one: walk through the tunnel of chaos. Let’s stop tolerating and accommodating each other and love each other enough to be honest. Let’s stop settling for pseudo community and pursue authentic community. Let’s stop avoiding it and running away from it and run headlong toward it.
It is the kind of relationship Jesus enjoyed with His followers and the kind of relationship we see described in Acts 2 and in Paul’s letters to the churches he helped start. It might be painful getting there, but it might just be beautiful on the other end. It might be a painful process, but it will be authentic result.
